Thinking back on some of my prayer journals, I remember during prayer the Lord saying: “I have given you a dowry fit for a king.”-That just continues to make me realize that any man won’t do. My dowry is specifically designed for someone, and it’s important that I understand that. It’s not being “picky” it’s understanding what’s inside of you, and who deserves what you have to give, & whose built to love me through it all. What I have to offer, every man will not be able to receive, or recognize it for it’s greatness. To those it will sound like nagging, or something worthless. But to the one it’s designed to help, it will be fresh water springing up from my well, that has been made deep by the Holy Spirit, in order from him to be able to drink from daily.
Well I came across this write up about DOWRY…CHECK IT OUT!
Written by Aleathea Dupree, Copyright © All Rights Reserved.
“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.” Proverbs 18:22
There are two kinds of husbands in this world: those who recognize and celebrate the true value of their wives, and those who do not. The husbands who recognize and celebrate the value of their wives reap a harvest of perpetual wealth and abundant blessings in their marriages. The husbands who fail to recognize and celebrate the true value of their wives rob themselves of the riches of the full benefits God intends when He blesses a man with a wife. Regardless of a husband’s response or recognition, there is something of tremendous value that God gives to every wife: He gives her a dowry of Divine favor.
Traditionally, a dowry is something of great value that is provided by a father for his daughter to bring with her into marriage. The purpose of the dowry is to help the husband take proper care of his wife, and to protect the wife against ill treatment by her husband. In the same way, when one of God’s daughters marries, God provides a divine dowry of special favor that she brings with her into the marriage. This divine dowry of special favor positions the husband and provides him with the opportunity to obtain preferential treatment and special regard from God because of his wife.
The unmarried man is not the beneficiary of this particular kind of favor: it is reserved for the man who “finds a wife.” Since this special favor is only available to the man who takes a wife, evidently, it is favor that God knows he needs in order to have good success in his role as a husband. This special favor is a gift — a special grace — from God to put the husband in the most advantageous position to take care of his wife and make progress in his marriage.
The key to the husband receiving this special favor is in understanding that this gift is a wellspring that God allows to flow through the wife. The key to releasing the flow of this favor lies in how the husband treats his wife. The more favorably the husband treats his wife, the more this special favor flows into the marriage. Conversely, the less favorably the husband treats his wife, the less Divine preferential treatment or special regard he receives.
The husband must receive this favor, or more accurately, obtain it, which implies that it will require some effort on his part to draw it out. This favor does not just come with the wife and work on the husband’s behalf no matter how he treats her. It’s a flow. It flows out of and through her life into her husband’s life to bless him and to help him. Because it is a flow, it can be dammed up or pumped up. If the husband treats his wife well, this special favor of God will flow freely. But, if the husband mistreats his wife, he will block the flow and that favor will not work for him. As a matter of fact, it can even work against him.
To see how the favor a wife brings can work against a husband, consider these two passages spoken directly to husbands in Malachi 2:13-14 and 1 Peter 3:7:
And this you do with double guilt; you cover the altar of the Lord with tears [shed by your unoffending wives, divorced
by you that you might take heathen wives], and with [your own] weeping and crying out because the Lord does not regard your offering any more or accept it with favor at your hand
Yet you ask, Why does He reject it? Because the Lord was witness [to the covenant made at your marriage] between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously and to whom you were faithless. Yet she is your companion and the wife of your covenant [made by your marriage vows]. (Amplified)
In this passage in Malachi, these husbands placed themselves in a position of God’s displeasure because they have “dealt treacherously” towards their wives. Treachery in marriage (which God hates), particularly on the husband’s part, often results in divorce (which God also hates). I believe that every marriage that ends in divorce can be traced back to treacherous dealings within the marriage. Suffice it to say, dealing treacherously is a major favor blocker.
The word treacherous means to be:
- Deceptive: leading someone to believe what is not true; giving a false impression
- Faithless: not adhering to allegiance, promises, vows, or duty; ready to betray trust; traitorous
- Untrustworthy: not deserving of trust or confidence; undependable; unreliable
- Dangerous: causing danger; perilous; risky; hazardous; unsafe; able or likely to cause physical injury
- Unstable: unsteady; likely to sway; wavering; unsettled; easily moved, shaken or overthrown
The favor that the wife brings into the marriage gives the husband an opportunity to gain special regard from God. However, if the husband acts treacherously towards his wife in any of the above ways, God says He will “not regard” the husband when he comes before Him. God provides us with additional insight as He repeats this thought in 1 Peter 3:7:
In the same way you married men should live considerately with [your wives], with an intelligent recognition [of the marriage relation], honoring the woman as [physically] the weaker, but [realizing that you] are joint heirs of the grace (God’s unmerited favor) of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered and cut off. [Otherwise you cannot pray effectively.] (Amplified)
What is the significance of the husband’s offering or prayers being hindered and cut off? Our offerings and prayers to God are not for God’s benefit: they are for our benefit, so that we can receive from Him the answers we need and the blessings He wants to pour into our lives. In both the passage in Malachi 2 and in 1 Peter 3, the husband is held responsible for the treatment of his wife, and in both instances, the husband’s ability to receive from God is hindered and cut off if he mistreats his wife.
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